A New Season

Spring is here!  There is still snow on the wood trails and on the south side of the clearing here but everything is stirring and coming out of hiding.  The pasture has many spiders scurrying here and there.  I have seen a few butterflies or moths out sunning themselves.

I am anxious to hear the Boreal Chorus Frog and the Wood Frog start their mating calls.  Our amphibian book tells me they start in April some time.  I imagine they are not in too much of a rush since there is still a lot of ice in the marsh.  Dan & I noticed a couple of Canada Geese a few weeks ago standing on a frozen marsh and I imagined one irritated saying to the other “I told you it was too early to leave!”  A couple swans let out loud honks as they flew overhead; I have seen & heard a few Robins and the Dark Eyed Junco’s are here in large numbers.

I am also watching to see when the red tailed hawk comes back to nest just north of our house; I have heard a hawk but have not seen it yet.  There should be a lot of food available for them as the field to the east of its nesting site still has standing canola and I imagine a great micro habitat for fat happy mice.  The local farmer has driven his combine to a local canola field and made a few passes to test harvest feasibility.  May be too - wet not sure what the verdict was since the combine is parked at the edge of the field.

It will be a while before we get out in our field - hopefully by the end of April.

I am anxious to get out into the field with the disc we purchased last year and had modified this winter to fit the 3 point hitch on our tractor.  I still have to read the tractor hitch manual and look at a few You Tube videos about discing. The rest of my learning curve will happen when I actually get out in the field.  

I have planted some flats with onions, tomatoes, peppers and herbs.  The tomatoes need to be transplanted already. I am not in too much of a rush to plant flats since we transfer these flats out of the house to cold frames during the day and back in at night.  The end of this week I am scheduled to plant 30 flats so everything will have to stay outside with heaters and thermal row cover during the night.  It will be a blessing to have our permanent greenhouse built this summer.

This growing season we are planting a full acre of vegetables.  We will be doing tailgate sales in Grimshaw and Manning once a week.  We will be in Peace River every Saturday doing tailgate sales one week and the farmers market the next week.  It will be a very busy season and we are still looking for a summer assistant to help us with the workload.  Having an extra set of hands will also help us complete the greenhouse and get the orchard fence and trees planted this year. 

I have ordered heritage chickens from the University of Alberta again this year, hopefully we do not get as many roosters as we did last year.  We have decided to overwinter laying hens this year so we will have a constant supply of fresh eggs.

Grief and Loss

Our Thor

Last Pic of Molly - Yes She's Sitting in the Kitchen Sink

I’m sorry for our silence.  We suffered some losses in the fall and that has given rise to some grief to be worked through and it has taken this long to get to a place where it is appropriate to share these things.

Thor and Molly are gone. 

Molly was not a big surprise and we had some measure of influence over the timing.  Louise wrote on Dec. 7th:

“Molly cat has been on a steady decline for three weeks now.  We got her some medication to control pain and treat an infection she had to make her last days as comfortable as possible.  She has not been eating very much the last few days and looked so fragile and weak we decided to take her to the vet to be euthanized this morning.  It was such a hard decision to make and it broke my heart to see our feisty, ornery little Molly so weak and disoriented.  At the ripe old age of 18 we knew she wasn’t going to bounce back and that it was her time to rest in peace.”

In fact, Molly had been in decline for about six months.  She seemed to stabilize for a while, but she took a turn for the worst in November.  There was sadness and grief for me, but there was mostly relief.  She had always slept with us at night.  In the last few months she had taken to sleeping in different places around the house that were hidden or isolated – it was like she was looking for safe places.  Molly had always been an anxious cat, but it seemed like her anxiety was consuming her.  When we got to the Vet’s and she was given the needle she lay down on my hand and slowly drifted off.  It was peaceful and gentle.  The staff were very compassionate.  As a former hospital chaplain intimately familiar with death and end-of-life experiences, I was quite appreciative of their professionalism, gentleness and support.

Thor did not come back from one of his forays into the forest.  We searched for him along the river and in the forest places we frequented together.  We put up posters at local dog places from Manning to Grimshaw.  Nothing.  We don’t really know what happened, but we are confident that he is dead.  There are a few reasons for this.  As Louise observed, “… [We had] Thor for only six months and [he] had both become very special and loved even though [he] had “issues” that some people may not have accepted; … but we learned to manage him as best we could and give him love and attention for the time he was with us.”  Thor was incredibly aggressive towards all manner of creatures not part of his pack when he was around home.  When we took him off the farm he was usually OK with people unless there was something that put him off them.  So we figure that he didn’t come back because he couldn’t, and it is inconceivable that he would allow a stranger to apprehend him.  Our neighbour thinks an irresponsible hunter may have shot him.  That’s possible I suppose.  I think he left the farmyard responding to a threat, and got in over his head. 

Louise was working alone in the yard that day.  Thor would keep an eye on her whenever she was out working.  This was always a source of comfort for me because Louise gets quite absorbed in her work and doesn’t pay attention to the forest around her – and with Thor around it wasn’t a problem, he watched for her.  He wouldn’t leave her alone unless he thought it was necessary.

Based on observing him over the summer and seeing the choices he makes the soldier in me came to appreciate that Thor had a very sharp tactical sense about him.  He was pretty good at analyzing threats and responding appropriately.  I remember once coming back from a walk.  We were moving through the middle meadow playing as we went and all of a sudden Thor wheeled and charged into the forest a few meters away with his war bark on.  Moments later we heard the protests of a bear being chased crashing through the woods with Thor in hot pursuit.  Based on the barking he seems to have kept on the bear for about a kilometer.  On another occasion we were all walking along a trail.  We came up a low rise and Louise and I could see a large black bear about 50 meters further down the trail walking away from us, but unaware of us as well.  We stopped and watched as Thor moved on ahead of us to a point where he would be able to see the bear.  As he began to crest he froze – then he relaxed a little and just observed, not barking or going after the bear.  It seemed like he recognized the bear was not an immediate threat and that everything would be fine all things being equal, but he kept himself between the bear and us and remained quite alert.  Eventually the bear happened to look back over his shoulder and boy was he surprised!  He just kind of shook himself and bolted off into the forest to his right.  Thor just sat down and watched him go, then he looked back at us with his tongue out as if to say, “You may continue your walk.”  Another time while we were working outside with the Chipper I noticed that Thor was guarding us as he sat with his back to us peering up a trail that was the most likely approach from the forest.  Thor was a dog with a job and he was very serious about it.

Nope.  I can’t believe he just wandered off while Louise was working the chipper – it wasn’t in his nature.  I believe he recognized a threat to Louise and decided it was best to go after it – given the time of year, probably wolves.

I have never had a dog before.  I really bonded with Thor, and in a way I had never experienced before.  He was a kindred spirit in many ways.  He seemed like a warrior, and a wounded one at that – if he was human I would have said he displayed behaviours characteristic of someone with PTSD.  He helped me feel a degree of safety and security that I had not been able to experience for a very long time.  To a certain degree I still feel these things, albeit less so, so I think the experience of Thor was quite therapeutic for me.

Thor had strong boundaries surrounding physical contact, but he was letting both of us in.  I had gotten to the point where he would let me hug him; sometimes I could put my head on his side when we were lying in the field.  One thing I absolutely loved was the head thing.  When I sat down on the ground often he would sit opposite and turn his head downward while leaning forward.  One day I imitated him, and our foreheads came together gently.  We just sat there holding that.  Then one of us would break it and we would sit there looking into each other’s eyes.  He had such beautiful brown eyes.  They would glitter and it would be like he was smiling.  He was a happy dog, a good companion and a fierce protector.  Whatever happened, I hope it was swift.

In the days and weeks that followed I prayed over Thor.  I asked God to return him to us, if that were still possible.  And if it were not, I asked God to give Thor a home and to let him know how much we both loved him and missed him.  I also asked that God keep Thor close and give him peace and security - take away his anxiety.  This went on for about three weeks.  One night I had the most wonderful dream.  I was in the city in front of house I did not recognize.  It was a comfortable summer day.  And there was Thor, harnessed to some kind of small cart, which soon disappeared as he came to me.  He sat down and I knelt down.  He sat there smiling with his beautiful eyes, then we did the head thing and held it.  I awoke with that image in my mind.  I had such a peaceful feeling that I quickly named the dream a moment of grace and decided that God had answered my prayer by showing me that Thor was OK in a way that was powerful for me and that I could understand – the dream was so intensely real.

The day I took Molly to the Vet Louise wrote:

“This morning Dan & I woke up to -35°C temperatures.  Yikes… too cold.  The sun is out now and the house should get very warm this afternoon as the sun shines in all day because it is so low in the southern sky.  The birds are taking advantage of the suet and seeds I have filled the feeders with this morning.  We only have Bill our three and a half your old cat now.  Thor did not come home four weeks ago now and we do not know what happened to him.  It has been a difficult time losing two of our family members.”

Yes it has, but another soon entered our lives.  Little Maddy, short for Madeleine, found her way to our Vet from an adoption place.  They found her alongside a road with a severe road rash.  She was 12 weeks when she joined us.  She has been adopted by Bill and has settled right in to our lives.  She is a cutie. 

I guess I should say something about circle of life, and that they will live on in our hearts -  blah, blah, blah.  Those clichés are tired and they don’t speak to the pain of loss that still sits inside of me.   I’m still grieving Thor’s untimely death and feeling the openness of my wound.  In time I suppose that pain will turn to melancholy, then to acceptance – but I’m not there yet.  I feel like I have lost a brother in arms.  I need to honour him.  I need a body to bury…

Freedom

Once again I am sitting out on the verandah enjoying a beautiful sunny day.  We haven’t had a lot of these over the past month or so as it’s been overcast and grey – quite unusual for this region.  The sun is warm, the snow is melting, and there is a light breeze.  Louise, Molly and Thor are here.  It is a pretty quiet scene; even the normal country sounds seem subdued today.  It’s like everything is enjoying this reprieve from the early winter and just relaxing in the warmth of a still strong sun.  There is a certain peacefulness that comes with sitting on a verandah in the sunshine - a sense that all is well.

A short few days ago I was sitting in a room waiting for a meeting to begin listening to the chatter of friends reconnecting.  I took some time to check in with myself and I found that I had a kind of floating feeling, like I was disconnected or ungrounded.  This struck me as odd.  I associate such feelings with being out of balance or with the aftermath of trauma, and I didn’t really feel either.  I opened myself up further to these feelings and just kind of pushed off from the edge to swim out into the middle and see what was going on.  As I floated the chatter of the room seeped in occasionally – talk of unity, group identity, belonging.  It was then I realized that I wasn’t feeling ungrounded so much as freedom. 

Webster defines Freedom as: 

1:  the quality or state of being free: as

a :  the absence of necessity, coercion, or constraint in choice or action

b :  liberation from slavery or restraint or from the power of another :  independence

c :  the quality or state of being exempt or released usually from something onerous

I think my sense of freedom comes from the absence of necessity and constraint in choice or action.  But it is also a state of being.  As I floated there I reflected that for the first time since I was probably 13 I didn’t really identify closely with any particular group or organization.  I don’t really feel obligated towards any entity.  I don’t really feel like I’m committed to some particular project.  I just am.  It is a very novel feeling for me.  I think it is really the natural progression of a process of growth that began while I was still in the military when I started to move away from defining my sense of Self in terms of what I did in favour of what I believe.  Perhaps the move from Edmonton allowed me to make a break with some archaic structures that no longer served a purpose and were just hanging on to things familiar.  Now, even though I still have the same kinds of community involvement and professional interests, the change of location and setting were enough to knock away those facades and to allow a fresh presentation to the world.  An obvious metaphor would be that of a butterfly emerging from its cocoon to spread its wings and begin its exploration of a world full of possibility; venturing forth in a new way, open to new possibilities, new challenges.  So it is also a state of liberation and of release.

Ravens are noisy flyers.  A few have been criss-crossing the yard and the beat of their wings really do make quite a bit of noise when that’s all you can here.  Of course that gets Thor up and chasing them – not quite sure what that’s about.  I have been seeing lots of interesting birds this fall.  I had thought all the trumpeter swans had gone south, but then I saw several again last week.  I saw a young bald eagle last week too.  There have also been an extraordinary number of gyr falcons around.  It’s a wonder there are any mice left at all!

Freedom.  It’s also a place I think.  Like a kingdom, though not the Kingdom.  Maybe it’s a fiefdom of the Kingdom, given the gift of freewill we are all granted.  It is a place where I live.  It is a very nice place.  It’s a place where my spirit can roam; where I can spread my wings; where Thor can be stirred by the beat of my wings.  A place where my spirit is free to glide and swoop and survey this corner of creation and all those who come to pass by and to pause to rest and to share.  Of course this place of freedom is not an entitlement, it is earned, it is attained, it is a place along the way that is found by making the journey in the first place.  And it is not free per se, there is a cost, a price to be paid.  I imagine the cost and the coin is different for each person as is, I suspect, the way in which we each experience this state of being.  Similarly, it is not a gift to be cherished so much as a responsibility to be born, or maybe it’s gift and burden; blessing and curse.  I dunno.  But I do realize that I stand at a crossroads and there are many different paths – one of which is becoming a hermit.  That would be so wonderful for the introvert in me, but I think it would be very unhealthy in the medium term, and I think it would also be shirking the responsibility I named earlier. 

What is that responsibility?  What responsibility accrues to freedom in the fullest sense of that word?  Well, in my worldview my life is a gift to me bestowed by my Creator.  My responsibility then becomes living that life to the fullest extent possible given my potential, for living well, for choosing rightly, and by profiting from my mistakes.  I think part of my particular challenge is to take time to enjoy life and the act of living.  I believe my Creator wants to share many things with me, things best learned within creation.  I need to be mindful of my Self; present to my neighbours; and receptive to the natural world.  I need to slow down and open myself up to the creation that surrounds me and it’s richness.  There is a receptivity exercise that sounds flaky, but is really quite wonderful if you give it a chance.  You find a comfortable place free of distraction where you can observe a living plant, preferably a tree.  You clear your mind of any thoughts or ideas relative to that plant and open yourself up to what it wants to communicate to you, or rather, what God wants to communicate to you about this other living thing.  The idea is that we spend so much time and energy imposing meaning on the world around us that we miss the meaning and wisdom that is already resident and available to those who but take the time to listen and become aware.  God speaks in the still, small voice.  I need to spend more effort listening, in being present to that voice in its many forms.  Freedom to choose how I will be with God.  Freedom to choose.  Freedom.

A Still Small Voice

Receptivity: Listening to Our Environment

Snow on October 1st! And most of it stayed.  Since then we have received more snow and could have taken out the cross-country skis.  I must admit in August I was thinking fall was coming soon when I was harvesting the fall vegetables.  I have no scientific reasoning why we would be getting an early winter, only my sixth sense.  That said, it still caught us off guard as far as winter preparation in the yard and garden.  The last of the potatoes were dug up the day before a major wet snow fall October 7th and we did not get the oat cover crop worked into the soil or the garden tilled and ready for the spring planting.  I also did not get the garlic planted so I will have to plant it in the spring, which is still acceptable but produces smaller bulbs.   My main concern is starting the next growing season behind the eight ball.

I have been evaluating what I was doing late September and early October and wondering if I should narrow my focus.  I was taking time to make pickles and freeze some vegetables for our own use, which is important, but we can also buy these since we do not have a large family and use relatively small quantities.  I also took time to go to Grande Prairie and Edmonton, which maybe was not the best use of my time.  I think next year I will focus on the field work when the weather is good and evaluate all tasks, personal or business, as immediately necessary or not.  I will use all of this information as I start planning for next years growing season.

On a different note, we have seen many raptors in the area stopping to hunt for food while on their migration south.  On the Thanksgiving Day weekend I counted eight different raptors while driving from Dixonville and realized I need to make time to take the binoculars and learn to differentiate between raptor species.  I noticed the American Kestrels had already gone south; not sure when they left.

After speculating that the bears may be hibernating already, we spotted a black bear walking along the wood line on two separate occasions, once from the comfort of our living room and the second time he was plodding along ahead of us on our evening walk with Thor.  We were walking head long into the wind and snow and the bear did not smell us but quickly ran into the bush when it heard us.

October 21st I was walking with Thor in the woods and a butterfly or moth flew over my head.  It had the color and look of the Common Wood Nymph or Cabbage White butterfly.  I was so surprised to see it laboriously flying over my head I just watched it fly into the brush.  It was not a sunny day and I wondered how it had the power to fly.  I tried to find information about butterflies that can survive the winter as adults, but of the ones that can survive none of them were white.  A few species can become dormant and survive in a sheltered area. 

Yesterday I watched a Woolly Bear caterpillar making its way slowly across my walking path and when I got home I looked for more information about this little guy.  Woolly bear caterpillars survive the winter by producing “cryoprotectant” described as antifreeze proteins and they are able to freeze solid without damaging their tissue.  In the spring they pupate into the Isabella tiger moth.  Woolly Bears are found in the Arctic and require years to feed as a caterpillar before they are ready to pupate because the summers are so short (Wikipedia).   The Old Farmers Almanac informed me Woolly Bears are used to forecast the severity of the upcoming winter!  Interesting, I read on.  The wider the brown center strips compared to the black sections the milder the winter will be and the smaller the brown section the colder it will be.  This little guy had a small brown strip compared to pictures of Woolly Bears on the Internet.  There you go, nature called it, we have a harsher winter ahead of us.

Stewardship

I’m sitting out on the verandah with a cup of coffee enjoying a rare sunny day as the geese fly back and forth getting ready for the big trip south.  Louise and I went to check in with our local pair of Trumpeter Swans the other day.  They have two young ones that are about the size of an average Canada Goose and they look like they are about ready for a long flight.  We recently hosted a family reunion and we are just now returning to our normal routine and feeling rested.  Reunions are tough if you are an introvert like me – even tougher when you live in semi-isolation and the people come to you!

It was nice having everyone here and sharing our space with them, as well as our vision for what we want to do here.  It has given me pause to reflect on our journey here on the land and an important spiritual dimension that has emerged for me – stewardship.

We have held title to this property for a little over three years now.  We began our search for this farm online and quickly identified 48 different properties that fit our general parameters.  Closer scrutiny of these properties quickly cut the list in half.  We then set out to see all 24 of these properties, which were scattered all over the province.  A couple went off the market before we could see them, but we saw at least 22 places.  It was fun driving around seeing these places.  We got to see a lot of the province and to appreciate the beauty of a prairie winter.  It was a real adventure for me.  While we had our list of features we were looking for and a vague sense of what would be nice to have…

Hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of geese just went by, and they were all honking!

…anyways, we soon realized that there was something else operating in the background for both of us independently.  We always had an emotional response to each property – a like or dislike, a sense of ease or discomfort, a connection to a place or a sense of being deflated.  We agreed to honour these reactions from the beginning and always included this intuitive assessment, the gut reaction if you will, in our overall assessment of the property.  After we viewed a place we took note of its features and how well they seemed to meet our identified needs, compared it to the other properties we had seen to get a ranking, and then we allowed our response to influence the ranking.  Sometimes it knocked a property down to the bottom of the list.  Sometimes it was the tie-breaker criteria.  On a couple of occasions it moved a property up the list from where the objective criteria suggested it be placed.  In the case of this property, the strong connection we both felt to the land here overcame what were some significant objective disadvantages.

My experience over the last three years of entering into and exploring my subjective response to this land has been very rich and wonderful.  It has been a healing journey for me; one that has opened up new opportunities for growth and new vistas for contemplation and reflection, as well as, new ways to access my faith.  I feel at peace here.  I feel truly connected to the world around me and I have a sense of where I fit in the cosmos, within creation.  I can zoom in to appreciate a small flower or insect, and I can zoom out to gain a perspective on the flow of time and human action within creation.  In both instances I hold up for scrutiny my relationship to the Divine, viewed and experienced in new fresh and wonderful ways.

I have discovered that this sense of connectedness to the universe is for me a connectedness to God, and that this connection is strongest for me in a more natural setting.  The closer I can get to living in a state of nature, the stronger this connection feels.  My own Garden of Eden as it were, or a personal paradise.  Apparently my garden is best kept at a constant warm temperature and free of biting bugs, and mammals for that matter, as physical discomfort serves to distract me from the experience.  I think it is in this connectedness, this profound peacefulness, that I experience the healing of God.  It isn’t a dramatic healing…more like a movement towards wholeness, fitting things together, cleaning the mechanism, integrating aspects of Self and past experience.

This healing began almost immediately with my arrival on the Land three years ago.  It gave rise to a sense of sacred connection, which I feel particularly strongly in certain places here.  It has also given rise to a sense of being in relation to the Land itself, of being responsible for it, or more accurately, being responsible for what I do on it and to it.  I also feel a responsibility to tend to it, preserve it, to care for it.  This has come out in a few different ways.

Firstly, I seem to be trying to minimize our impact on the land, and to mitigate that impact where possible.  I say seem to be because this isn’t really a conscious strategy.  It is more of a spiritual or aesthetic preference that is emerging as I take down buildings we don’t need or modify old ones for new purposes, remove unnecessary fencing, limit and restrict vehicle movement. 

Secondly, the old three Rs: reduce, reuse, recycle.  I don’t claim to be an expert in repurposing building materials, but I sure do try my best and I buy ‘new’ with reluctance.  We have also tried to incorporate Net Zero design features into our home reno, and we intend to implement a grid-tied solar system and geothermal heating when money and related projects allow.  Of course we do the other stuff: separate trash, compost and recyclables; use CFLs and LEDs; 100 mile diet, etc., but we also have spent a lot of time investigating things like compost toilets, and contemplating the larger issues associated with what happens when stuff goes down the toilet or the sink.  Ideally we would like to operate as near to a closed system as is practical with as little reliance on fossil fuels as is possible, i.e. a truly sustainable agri model, but this ideal is tempered by our financial reality, geography and the state of current technology.

Lastly, tending to the garden.  I find myself drawn to what I have described with tongue and cheek as the need to get the forest organized.  This involves collecting up deadfall that is at hand, ostensibly for firewood, but also to allow for the free movement of wildlife and to remove some hazards from the forest such as widow makers; putting in some culverts to allow water to move more naturally; improving the tracks to reduce the impact of the cattle moving about.  This work is barely begun and will never be done.  Tending to the garden never is.

In doing this work I also tend to my spiritual garden.

The Garden

Thankfulness

One of our neighbors commented, there is much to be thankful for, a few Sunday’s ago and I have been reflecting on that statement and I agree most heartedly.  We have had abundant rain this summer and the grass and vegetation is lush and green.  Wild flowers and mushrooms are everywhere in a wide variety of species, which make walks very interesting.

We have had many perfect summer days, which I define as not too hot, calm and quiet.  Our garden is growing very well and the cauliflower and broccoli are especially beautiful this year.  I was picking vegetables for the Peace River Market in late July and noticed it was time to water and I thought it would be nice to have a little rain.  As I was driving home Saturday afternoon it started raining a few range roads from our farm and we had a few nice showers that afternoon.  This to me was just a little reminder that God is watching and providing us with what we need.   There is no need to worry or be anxious.

I have been selling produce at the Manning Farmers Market every Friday and the Peace River market every second Saturday and I am enjoying the experience.  I feel like I am part of the vendor family and enjoy getting to know the vendors.  They also provide tips and suggestions to help me out, which is greatly appreciated.  I have really enjoyed meeting and speaking with the customers and sharing gardening stories, as well as, recipes for various produce that is abundant and not everyone’s favorite, like swiss chard.  A friendly vendor beside me at the Peace River market said she makes lasagna with swiss chard instead of using pasta noodles; I tried it and we both enjoyed it.  Another customer told me about making salted herbs with the cilantro, dill, garlic scapes and parsley I had left over after the market.  Very nice indeed.

The first week of August we have had a lot of rain and it has been foggy most mornings.  I have been unable to weed and trim tomato plants because the garden is too wet and I only go into it to pick vegetables in order to minimize soil compaction.  I must say I am getting a little anxious about all the weeds and plant trimming that needs to be done but a little rest is in order.  I took time to photograph dew covered spider webs in the grass and shrubs that become visible on foggy mornings.  These spider webs can be seen everywhere and on these mornings I am struck by the awesomeness and beauty of nature.  

Morning Dew on a spider web

Country Life

Thor on the Job

I’m sitting in Madison’s Grill on Jasper Ave in Edmonton enjoying a very good cup of coffee.  My surroundings are pleasant and comfortable, but I’m feeling very tired and sad.  I’m still processing the news of the mass shooting in Florida.  I called a friend and talked about that event and my feelings.  I observed that just when you think progress towards a more just society is being made someone like Donald Trump comes along, or something hateful like the shootings in Florida occurs.  More tears…so much pain…I was looking at a bible earlier and I found myself staring at the beatitudes…blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted – that is my prayer for my friend and all those impacted by this evil.

I have come to Edmonton to celebrate a great achievement: Louise completed her program of study at the U of A and is being graduated today.  She will receive her Bachelor of Science in Agriculture degree!  Yea.  She has worked very hard and achieved much in this program.  Indeed, I think it is largely this journey of growth and discovery that has lead us to our farm, and happily so. 

Louise finished up her exams in late April and we then finished moving our household to the farm and sold the place in Edmonton.  We have officially been residents of the north for seven weeks now…and what a crazy time it has been.

We have a new family member.  Thor is a Great Pyrenees, and a rescue dog from the EHS.  He is 31/2 years old, over a hundred pounds, stands about 3 ½’ high and he is about 6’ stem to stern.  Great Pyrenees’ are known for their protectiveness and Thor has thoroughly embraced this trait.  He immediately adopted the cats and us into his family and he has taken ownership of the farmyard; none but family are allowed to be in the yard: no people at all (doesn’t matter if we have introduced you, nor if we are present – if you come to visit, stay in your car until we can calm him down); no large birds (apparently the small ones are ok); and no animals unless they are smaller than a squirrel.  If any of these are even scented on the wind, he reacts.  His tail is the first sign as it moves into a lovely upward curl, then comes a booming bark as he launches into a full on run towards the intruder or the perceived point of danger. 

Thor can go from 0 to 40km/hr in seconds and maintain that speed for at least 1500 m.  I know this to be fact.  One morning shortly after Thor joined us I hopped in our little car and set off for town.  This seemed to distress Thor a little bit and he started to trot along beside the car.  I thought this is no good, he is just going to run along after me and I’ll end up leading him off the farm...so I sped up.  Now, we had recently had a major snowfall that had delivered about a foot of heavy wet snow.  This had bowed over many trees and caused a significant amount of damage too throughout the woods.  It had also left a lot of standing water around.  So as I accelerated down the narrow dirt track that is our road off the land I was dodging droopy trees and weaving around potholes, hitting some and spraying mud and water everywhere.  I took the first bend at speed and accelerated into the second.  I felt like one of those crazy rally car drivers you see on TV.  On the straightaway after the second turn I checked my rear view mirror to see how far back Thor was and he wasn’t there.  I then glanced to my left and he was looking me in the eye, pacing me, tongue out and having a grand old time.  I checked my speed and sure enough I was doing 40k!  I hit the end of the track where it joins the county road, tapped the breaks and pulled the wheel down hard to the left and sloughed the car around so I was facing back the way I had come.  Thor dodged left as I hit the gas and shot back down the track.  He paused to bark at me and then hurtled himself down the track after me like some crazed hound after its fox.  Again he caught up to me and gave me a look as if to say, “Is this all you’ve got?”  I have since found out that he will do this at least three times before losing interest – thank fully one of us can be an adult about these things and knows when enough is enough.  So…when I have to go into town I can either ask Louise to hold him when I leave, or allow time for our little game.  When we walk him in the pasture and he gets excited he likes to sprint in a figure 8 pattern with us at the centre of the pattern, at the intersection.  It is a sobering sight to see a 100lb dog coming at you with such speed.  The trick here is to remain perfectly still as he approaches and then brushes your leg as he passes by.  I often find myself thinking of a comet passing by the Earth as he hurtles towards me – I wonder if this is what the guys at NORAD experience every time an asteroid whizzes past the planet?

We now have chickens.  They arrived as chicks and have grown and thrived.  Their clucking now fills the air around the summer guest house.  Thankfully we have surrounded their villa with an electric fence, as they don’t seem to be either friend or foe to Thor, though possibly a food source.  The chicks spent some time in the basement after the snow storm knocked out the power for a couple days so the heat lamps in the guest house couldn’t keep the little ones warm.  We both woke up around 4 am for some reason.  Louise realized the power was out so we got up and quickly moved a bunch of stuff we had not yet unpacked around in the basement to get access to the woodstove and the wood.  We got the fire going and then moved the chicks inside and set them up downstairs.  That went on for a couple days.  Thank fully the cats wanted nothing to do with the chicks.

We also have a new furnace now.  Apparently the old one was done and not functioning well, giving off carbon monoxide, which would explain my headaches when I would work in the basement!

We got to witness a spectacular aerial attack on a wildfire burning very near us, which took the home of our neighbour.  That was an anxious day, and a sobering one, as I realized how vulnerable we were and dramatically different our life could be if it came our way.  As I worked on renovating the guest house in preparation for the chick’s arrival I watched the billowing clouds of smoke and made my evacuation plan.

There were other adventures and challenges this past month, most of them small in magnitude.  To some degree they were the fruit of adjusting to our new environment, growing pains if you will.  Louise summed it up with the statement, “Country living!”  This was both justification and observation, which left me with the sense that nothing more needed to be said – this is reality, learn how to be in this new context. 

As we drove through downtown last night I felt a rising sense of excitement; all the energy, the hustle and bustle.  I found it appealing, and then I became worried.  What will it be like when we return to the farm?  Is the honeymoon over?  Will I feel lost and isolated out there on the edge of the wilderness?  Then I woke up this morning after a very brief sleep in a room that seemed to warm and in a place that was way too noisy for me with sirens and cars and people hootin and hollerin…and no Thor standing watch through the night.  No, I don’t think I’ll be missing this, not now, not ever.  I miss people.  Maybe this is part of my sadness over the murders in Florida, a tragedy effecting innocents…effecting my friends here. 

…grant us healing.

Peace be with you always.

Reinventing Myself - Phase Two

The Nuttall’s Blister Beetle was very abundant last summer because it follows the grasshopper cycles.  The larvae feed on grasshopper eggs and the adults feed on crop plants. 

Ahh February 21st, the days are getting longer, the geraniums have been rescued from their dark resting place and it is time to think about planting seedlings.  I start to wonder what Mother Nature has in store for us this year.  The evening news reports that fire season training starts March 1 and it is expected to be an active year for firefighters.  The Alberta Government has also issued its forecast for grasshopper populations and they are expected to be as prolific as last summer. 

While it is wise to acknowledge environmental factors that are out of my control it is important to focus on what I can manage.  The most important management factor, in my opinion is to provide a wide diversity of plants, landscapes, and habitat for insects and animals above ground as well as below ground.  A natural habitat for ground beetles, parasitic wasps and pollinators is important to maintain natural prey/predator interactions in order to decrease the chances of one insect infesting and destroying crops.  Feeding the soil microbes with green manure and compost will provide them with a well-aerated soil that holds optimum moisture levels.  This encourages a diverse and healthy microbial population, which is important in nutrient cycling and mutualistic fungal/plant interactions.

Since I am talking about soil microbes, here is an interesting fact for the month. When you go for a walk in the woods after a summer rain, that nice earthy smell that surrounds you is from a compound called geosmin released by Streptomyces bacteria. (Kind of sounds like Sheldon Cooper from the Big Bang Theory J).

I have to thank my professors for making me into an insect and soil nerd.  One in particular fostered my curiosity and appreciation for animals and insects with his shear knowledge and enthusiasm for the subject.  As my time in school comes to a close I think of all the professors I have had who are so enthusiastic about the topics they teach and who have given me new insights about so many things. I realize how much I still don’t know but I have to admit I prefer to continue my education with hands on experience.  I will not miss sitting behind a desk and working on papers and studying.  I am ready to move to the farm and work and have soil under by fingernails – then I will have a feeling that all is right in my world. 

A new path

Journey of discovery

         Persons more hip than I tell me that this text is a blog.  My wife and I are computer literate and we are comfortable with the technology, but neither of us have really embraced it.  We have our smart phones and our laptops.  We make use of social media in a rudimentary sense, but you won’t get a tweet from us, people who invite me to join their online professional networks do so in vain, and don’t bother trying to find my Facebook page - just having a website for our business is a big step for us.  You see I am by nature a very private person.  Indeed, I am writing this “blog” under protest.  Part of me believes quite strongly that my wife and I are up to something really special, and that our experience of this special thing is worth sharing.  Another part of me is quite uncomfortable putting myself “out there” in any way, never mind in such a lasting fashion.  I’m told that once something is on the Net it can never be fully excised.  Alas, the romantic in me has won out.  The dreamer, as my mother once described me, has carried the day.  I will join with my wife and share a little bit of how I experience life here on the land.  We intend to take turns composing monthly installments.  We have different ways of viewing and understanding life, we also have different roles in the business just as in life, so we thought it would be interesting to write separately taking turns.  We shall see where this takes us.

       I‘m not a farmer.  I’m not particularly handy.  I’m definitely not mechanically minded.  And yet here I find myself living on a farm, renovating our house and planning great engineering projects.  I’m also not good with numbers or financial planning, etc.  As I pondered the big picture last night I paused to note that I should have written, “win lottery” into our development plan.  It’s important to note that my mom called me a dreamer, not a captain of industry.  Mom nailed it - dreaming is what I do well.  I think.  I reflect.  I ponder and I savour.  I love living on the farm.  My contributions to this evolving record of our journey will focus on my experience of the land in theological and spiritual terms.  I’ll also share some of the more practical and technical aspects of my contribution to growing our business and developing our farm.  I hope you will find some value for you in this.

Peace be with you always.